Puffs (episode transcript)

written by Matt Cox

​SPEAKERS
Mats Furuli, Lelia Hilton, Christina Kann
 
Christina Kann  00:22
Hi, my name is Christina, and when my cats are mad at me, I snuggle them!
 
all  00:29
Hi!
 
Lelia Hilton  00:29
My name is Leila, and I pooped on the potty like a big girl today!
 
all  00:35
Hi!
 
Mats Furuli  00:36
Hi, I'm Mats, and I'm just happy to be here!
 
all  00:39
Hi!
 
Lelia Hilton  00:43
Not what I was... Improv!
 
Christina Kann  00:47
Hey, gang. Welcome to the Restricted Section. It is me, your host, Christina. And for those who can't tell already, today we're covering the music -- the off-Broadway play, Puffs. I almost said "the musical." There's no music.
 
Lelia Hilton  01:02
I keep thinking it's a musical too, even though I've seen it.
 
Christina Kann  01:06
I am joined today by my beloved Lelia.
 
Lelia Hilton  01:09
Hi.
 
Christina Kann  01:11
Hello, hello. And we also have a returning special guest, Mats.
 
Mats Furuli  01:16
Hi!
 
Christina Kann  01:18
Hi, Mats. We're so happy you're here.
 
Mats Furuli  01:21
I'm so happy to be here.
 
Christina Kann  01:22
The reason that all three of us are here today is because we are all three Puffs.
 
Lelia Hilton  01:29
We're number 4!
 
Christina Kann  01:33
So yes, I wanted to get all of us together to talk about the play Puffs. I was taking notes at first, but I quickly realized that it was kind of a futile endeavor. Like while I was watching it, I was like, there's no way I can type everything that's happening because this movie, this play, is essentially the entire series of events of the entire Harry Potter series from the Hufflepuffs' perspective. But it's like a parody. So the four houses are Braves, Smarts, Snakes, and Puffs. And like, what are the Hufflepuffs doing? There's this guy named Wayne who's the main character, and he's just like so deeply unspecial. They're just having a great time, and fuckin Harry's just floppin around getting plot done.
 
Mats Furuli  02:33
Like completely by accident.
 
Christina Kann  02:40
So much of the reason that this play was even on my radar is because you've mentioned it a lot. And you want to tell everyone a little bit about like, when did you see it? Where did you hear about it from? What's your experience been?
 
Mats Furuli  02:57
I don't know when the first time I ever heard about it was, but the first time I decided that I wanted to watch it was when Mike Schubert, host of Potterless, decided to cover it on his podcast earlier this year or like late 2020. He ran out of books, so he's covering all the extra material. I know he's been doing My Immortal recently. Yeah. Just wonderful. Just horrible. Wonderful. Yeah. And yeah, I watched it. And it was just wonderful. It blew my mind in just the most wonderful, wholesome way possible. And yeah, my life is so much better because of because of this play.
 
Christina Kann  04:02
Me too. So um, Lelia and I both watched it for the first time this week. And Lelia, what are your initial feelings?
 
Lelia Hilton  04:13
I was fortunate enough to watch it with Haley. And Haley is a great person to watch anything with because yeah, she's so smart and funny. And so, you know, she gave me a lot of great insight. I watched it with Haley and Jason, who are both strong Ravenclaws. Yeah. And they were just like both looking at me like knowingly the whole time.
 
Christina Kann  04:43
I felt the same way. I watched it with Sean, who's a Slytherin, and the whole time I just kept like realizing that I was laughing so hard and looking back to make sure he was having fun. Like I feel like such a Puff.
 
Lelia Hilton  05:01
It's such a Puff move. I feel like immediately after that, I did something super Puffy too. I mean, that's just my whole life. You know, we just care a little bit more about, like, just just hanging out and like, friendship and not being a threat. Puff formation 4!
 
all  05:21
We are not a threat! Please be our friend!
 
Christina Kann  05:29
Oh, I just really relate. So, there was one character--I'm just gonna get this out of the way. There was one character in Puffs that I particularly related to, and I had this feeling and then Sean was like, "That girl is you." And then Haley also texted me that that girl was me. And it's Big Stupid, Leanne.
 
Mats Furuli  05:52
I knew it!
 
Christina Kann  05:55
She's she is, um, what is the name of that girl from Wizards of Waverly Place? You know?
 
Lelia Hilton  06:00
Oh, my God. Yes, Harper.
 
Christina Kann  06:02
Harper.
 
Lelia Hilton  06:03
Why do I know that?
 
Christina Kann  06:05
Just like a big adorable idiot. And I'm like, okay. She's like wearing a tutu and dancing around the stage. And I was like, it's kind of annoying that she reminds me of myself until at the end, she gives the speech that moves all the Puffs to stay and fight Voldemort. And then I was like I am Leanne!
 
Lelia Hilton  06:26
You are, and even like, down to the way she was dressed. And even her hairstyle, like everything. Everything about her. Haley for sure would not stop talking about that. She was just like, "I mean, tell me that's not Christina." And that's my best Haley impression, sorry Haley. And then she was like, "Guys, tell me that--" What's the main character's name again?
 
Mats Furuli  06:55
Wayne.
 
Lelia Hilton  06:56
Just like, "Tell me that Wayne doesn't look like kind of a lot like Sean." And I was like, "Oh my god, he does." They're both there!
 
Christina Kann  07:10
Okay, Mats, which character in Puffs do you most relate to?
 
Mats Furuli  07:14
Oh, um, I'm probably going to have to say Wayne for that one. The pop culture stuff.
 
Christina Kann  07:22
Oh yeah, he had like good t-shirts. Ninja Turtles and something else.
 
Lelia Hilton  07:28
They were so cute. I loved that he would always do like some kind of DIY cut-out that made it somehow Puffy.
 
Mats Furuli  07:39
That is one of my notes as well: Wayne's shirts are my absolute favorite.
 
Lelia Hilton  07:45
What are some specific examples, Mats? If you can remember?
 
Mats Furuli  07:48
Oh, yeah, one of them is Wolverine, but it's like, tape like a badger head. Another one, I think, is Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure, but it's Wayne, Oliver, and Megan.
 
Lelia Hilton  08:09
So cute!
 
Mats Furuli  08:14
It's great.
 
Christina Kann  08:16
Lelia, who do you relate the most to?
 
Lelia Hilton  08:20
I don't know. I related kind of to all of them as a group. I feel like I'm maybe more of a Megan. I'm not like as edgy or cool as her in any way--
 
Christina Kann  08:35
Dramatic.
 
Lelia Hilton  08:36
--but I am very dramatic, as we all know.
 
Christina Kann  08:39
She was so dramatic. Megan was like, "We're fighting!" and everyone's like, "Why? We don't have to."
 
Lelia Hilton  08:47
Maybe not, though. She's like, a little scarier than me. Maybe I would also be like a diet version of Leanne.
 
Christina Kann  08:59
Yeah, I did really love like, the pack mentality of the Puffs. It's like, we're in this together. I related to it so big. Like, they don't care about winning, because they're together. I've never related to anything more in my life.
 
Lelia Hilton  09:21
Me too. I grew up in a sports family. Like, they've all played in college or in high school, all throughout their lives. And like multiple sports, so many sport things. And I never did one sport for me, not one. It was all about theater and drama and chorus and things like that. Oh, man. Yeah, ever. I'm like lazy and don't want to exert myself and have no hand-eye coordination. Other than that, the main reason I never was interested is like, I just really don't care for that type of competition. It just doesn't do anything for me. I feel like it can just be a little mean, you know?
 
Christina Kann  10:19
Yeah. I completely agree. It's the yelling. Like being at a sporting event, the yelling is so aggressive. Okay, here's the thing: When people yell because of sports, they make my empathy alarms go off. I'm like, "Oh no, human in distress," but it's about like a very inconsequential thing that is like so far removed from our existence that I'm like, "But wait, my brain says this is stupid." Like the intersection of those two?
 
Lelia Hilton  10:51
Yeah, I get it. I think people focus too much on competition, instead of like the experience.
 
Mats Furuli  11:00
Just having fun.
 
Lelia Hilton  11:05
So it's like we're number three, or even maybe we're number four. Like, either way we don't care. Like, we're, we're, it's fun. We're doing it together like Cedric's here for a little while. Speaking of how did we feel about Cedric, you know, the actor that portrayed him, and then his whole little arc that happened?
 
Christina Kann  11:27
Okay, I there when you said Cedric, I started laughing because the actor who plays Cedric, then later plays Voldemort. And like, he looks so ridiculous in that role that I have a hard time picturing Cedric now because all I can picture is like the bathrobe and the tape on his--
 
Lelia Hilton  11:44
He just has tape on his nose!
 
Christina Kann  11:46
It's the best they could do.
 
Mats Furuli  11:49
Yeah, it's great. And like, honestly, I love James Foley as Cedric, and whenever I'm reading the books now, like, that's who I'm picturing as Cedric.
 
Christina Kann  12:07
His whole personality screams coolest Hufflepuff. Like, yeah, I guess you're cool. But like...
 
Lelia Hilton  12:17
Well, it's just like they say, what is it? Year Four, or the year where the Puffs mattered? It's so true, but he's much more personable and like a "cool guy" kind of Cedric. Not that we we hate on Robert Pattinson's portrayal at all.
 
Christina Kann  12:41
Different vibes. So okay, we said that I'm similar to Leanne. That's more of like an aesthetic. She's big dumb in a way that I'm not, right? I feel like if I was in the Puffs, I would have more of a Cedric role because I'm a little bit of a leader. I build other people up. I'm like, "Come on, let's go. We're gonna get fourth place."
 
Mats Furuli  13:05
I'm not in any way a leader.
 
Lelia Hilton  13:07
I just thought about the part when Cedric opens up the egg. It's just a guy screaming!
 
Mats Furuli  13:14
Oh, it's so good.
 
Lelia Hilton  13:19
I think I almost wet my pants. For listeners, the part in the books and in the movies when they open up the egg for the triwizard tournament and like, when it's not underwater, it's it's like a very terrifying scream, and in the play it's um, it's literally just like a dude offstage, like probably Wayne or one of them just like going like *screams*
 
Christina Kann  13:53
Honestly, this whole play had me dying laughing from the hilarious references like that to the original text. The plot that the pumps go down is like a totally different path from what Harry Potter and the gang are doing, but the all of the asides... Like in Goblet of Fire, Book 4 in Puffs, where Dumbledore is like, "Harry, did you put your name in this cup?" And he's like, "Nah," and Dumbledore's like, "I'm the definition of calm right now." You can't not mention it. For the Harry Potter fandom, that moment is like Viggo Mortensen breaking his toe. By law, you're required to mention it when it comes up.
 
Mats Furuli  14:45
Oh my god.
 
Christina Kann  14:46
So how do we feel like the tone of the story was different because of its perspective? Was it telling a different kind of story even?
 
Lelia Hilton  14:56
Yeah.
 
Christina Kann  14:56
For example, I always say that the Harry Potter narrative is a Gryffindor narrative. Like, "I am the chosen one and I need to sacrifice myself." Like so Gryffindor. But in contrast, I always say Avatar: The Last Airbender, that's a Hufflepuff series. Because it's about like, how do I do my job and protect the people I love without hurting anybody? You know what I mean? Like, how do I find balance? And that's like big Hufflepuff vibes. If so, like, how did the the context switch when our main characters switched?
 
Lelia Hilton  15:03
Um, I mean, one of the biggest things is just really seeing how much of a minor role like Harry -- it just kind of shows you the perspective of the entire story, and just like how Harry's quest and how Harry's arc really kind of fucked up, everybody else's life.
 
Christina Kann  15:54
The play Puffs kind of framed it as if Harry was going on side quests that were fucking up the main quest, you know, it's like, dude, you gotta stop. Like, we're trying to just go to school here.
 
Mats Furuli  16:09
Yeah, while the Harry Potter books are very much a like "chosen one," Puffs, in contrast, is like, this one guy wanting so badly to be the Chosen One, the hero, and he's having to come to grips with the fact that we're all in this together, like, having to learn that whole mentality. And yeah, I think, like as a Hufflepuff myself, I think it's a really nice mentality to have.
 
Christina Kann  16:58
Yeah, absolutely.
 
Lelia Hilton  16:59
Well, just like in Hamilton, you know, we have no control who lives, who dies, who tells our story.
 
Mats Furuli  17:14
There is literally a quote from Puffs, where the narrator goes, "Who lives, who dies," and every time I'm watching him, like, "Who tells your story?"
 
Lelia Hilton  17:29
*singing* "I tell your story."
 
Christina Kann  17:31
Okay. We can't do this. Because when that part of Hamilton comes up I am sobbing. Like she lives on to tell his story. It was her story the whole time! Okay. Sorry, sorry,
 
Lelia Hilton  17:42
*singing* "Let me tell you what I'm proudest of."
 
Mats Furuli  17:45
*singing* "The orphanage!"
 
Christina Kann  17:45
Okay, shut up. Don't TALK TO ME ABOUT THE ORPHANAGE! So I also really love how this is, this is the opposite of a "chosen one" story. It's like the chosen one in this story is like, an like a non-entity. And it's like, you cannot just sit around waiting for the chosen one. And you also can't thrust yourself into the spotlight and be the chosen one. You have to look around who is standing beside you and make a promise to work together to protect each other. And that's when I started crying at the end, when they all decide when Leanne gives her speech, and it's like, this is what Puffs do, is they just like, they protect what they love. And they do it together.
 
Mats Furuli  18:41
What you said is exactly why I love the portrayal of Harry's character in this play as well, because you can't want to be in the spotlight. And then like on the other hand, Harry's just like stumbling into the spotlight just succeeding without really meaning to.
 
Christina Kann  19:05
Yes, "stumbling" is a perfect word. I feel like the actor who played Harry in this was like a drunk toddler just like walking around, like wandering into danger or wandering out of danger. Also, if you're listening to this, you haven't seen it yet, just stop and go watch it. Because like the things that we're describing are so much funnier seen than described.
 
Mats Furuli  19:30
Yeah I have a really had time in any way shape or form describing or like doing this play justice. Like you're you're going to have to watch it.
 
Christina Kann  19:40
There is no like describing live theatre and I mean, this is a particular one where it's like, you got to experience.
 
Mats Furuli  19:48
A hundred percent. And I just want to add that Madeline Bundy, who plays Harry and Moaning Myrtle -- I just love the fact that the same person plays Harry and Moaning Myrtle -- but also Susie Bones, also was the lead set designer, prop designer, and costume designer for this play. It's wild.
 
Christina Kann  20:18
That is so crazy. So that brings me to a good point is that I mean, at least from a spectators perspective, watching this you can tell that every actor plays like 15 different characters, and it's like so impressive when the whole cast comes out at the end. You're like "Oh, yeah, there's only like 10 of these guys running around the stage like maniacs the whole time," but they each do such a good job. There's that one actor who plays McGonagall, Dumbledore #1, Professor Sprout, Megan's mom, every adult. She's got adult face, I guess.
 
Lelia Hilton  20:58
She's she's got the cheekbones.
 
Christina Kann  21:03
Totally. And she did Hannah Abbott too. But I think she is like the first voice that you hear in the whole play because she's doing a McGonagall voice. And I was like, "Damn, that's a really good accent."
 
Mats Furuli  21:15
That's a really good McGonagall impression holy shit.
 
Lelia Hilton  21:19
Also, the actress who plays Harry does the best Moaning Myrtle impression I think that I've ever heard. Like, we were dying.
 
Christina Kann  21:30
It's very good. Just another special Harry moment. Harry's like your friend who just like always needs a hug, kind of. I feel like this version of Harry's always--
 
Lelia Hilton  21:41
*kissing sounds*
 
Christina Kann  21:42
Yeah! He kisses Wayne's shoulder. He doesn't just kiss Wayne's shoulder; he kisses Wayne's shoulder four times in rapid succession. That makes it like so much cuter. Like an automatic weapon of kisses.
 
Lelia Hilton  21:58
And Harry in Hermione. How did you like their portrayal? How did you like the actors?
 
Christina Kann  22:03
Yes! That's what I was gonna bring up next.
 
Lelia Hilton  22:06
Ron and Hermione, sorry.
 
Christina Kann  22:07
Oh, yeah. When I started being like, "you have to see this because describing it is stupid," it reminded me that I was trying to get to Ronand Hermione are both played ostensibly by brooms.
 
Lelia Hilton  22:19
Mops? I don't know.
 
Christina Kann  22:20
Yeah, mops.
 
Mats Furuli  22:21
To be fair, I think the personality of Ron's character in this play pretty much exactly fits the character in the movies.
 
Lelia Hilton  22:32
Yeah, you're right.
 
Christina Kann  22:34
Harry has his whole fight and falling out with Ron as an mop.
 
Mats Furuli  22:41
And then Oliver comes in, and he's like, "Okay, I'm sure you guys will be fine." And then, "Hey, look, there's no need for you to be an asshole. Jeez! You really are the worst member of your family."
 
Christina Kann  22:57
Oh, my God. Yeah. Have you all seen The Good Place?
 
Mats Furuli  23:02
Yeah.
 
Lelia Hilton  23:02
Yeah, not all of it.
 
Christina Kann  23:06
Did Oliver in this remind you of Chidi a little bit?
 
Mats Furuli  23:08
Oh my god, yeah!
 
Lelia Hilton  23:09
Oh, yeah!
 
Christina Kann  23:11
Just like a little uptight. Like a little "Come on, bud, loosen up. You've got a great personality, but you're super uptight. You got to chill out."
 
Lelia Hilton  23:19
Oh my god, how much would that suck? Imagine being told you're a literal like mathematician, child genius. And then you're like the best student at your school. And then they're like, "Just kidding. You're going to wizard school. You suck. You're not brave or smart."
 
Christina Kann  23:44
Okay, like obviously not to the same extent, but like that is kind of what happened to Hermione in the book. Like she was a gifted child, right, who had devoted her life to studying, and then surprise, none of this matters to you; you have to go start over.I think that's why she was such a brat in the first book, because she is like trying to prove so hard that like she's got this, you know? Yeah. Little Oliver with his little shorts.
 
Lelia Hilton  24:10
And his mismatched paisley socks.
 
Christina Kann  24:13
Yeah. So something else that I liked about this is -- so the main trio is Wayne, who was like, you know, the stand-in for Harry. He's like the anti-chosen one. And then there's Megan, who sort of denies her Puff identity. She comes from a long family of Puffs, who wish they were Snakes, basically. And so she believes in her heart of hearts that she's an evil snake, so she hates being a Puff. And then there's Oliver, who is like a genius who learned that he's a wizard and has to start over. So one thing I really liked is how different those three characters were from each other because Harry and Ron and Hermione have a lot in common. They're all sort of dry, boring British people but also like, the way that they approach any situation is just like pretty much pure Gryffindor at all times. You know what I mean? Like they're really similar, but I felt like Megan, Wayne, and Oliver are like so different. They made a really strong trio because their skills are so different. The personalities are different. Just love them.
 
Lelia Hilton  25:21
Yeah, I think you're right. I love the contrast. I also think that Megan trying so so so hard to prove that she's not a Puff is just like the most Puff thing that she could have done.
 
Mats Furuli  25:35
Like full-on identity crisis. She goes from being a Snake in year one to "I'm into books now" in year two. And then in three, she's like, "Okay, yeah, I'm going to be with the Braves this year, because everything notable that ever happens in this school, happens to them" and then the first Brave that stumbles into the room is Neville.
 
Christina Kann  26:10
Yeah, and then by the end Megan is like so happy to be a Puff. And like, I relate to that. I feel like when I was younger, I was like, "Being nice is stupid. I'm smarter than everyone, I got this, and fuck you guys." I've said before that I was pretty shitty person when I was younger. And it was part of my journey that I like I'm like, yeah, Puff is the way to be. Yeah, Puff's the way to be.
 
Lelia Hilton  26:35
It's okay to not be the toughest or the bravest or strongest, you know, sometimes it's a little bit more special to be that person that people feel comfortable coming to and feel comfortable gathering with.
 
Christina Kann  26:47
Yeah, yeah, gathering. Lelia, Mats, I swear to God, we're gonna gather one day. Just you wait.
 
all  26:54
*singing* JUST YOU WAIT!
 
Mats Furuli  26:56
Hamilton again.
 
Christina Kann  27:00
Yeah, but definitely, Leila and I show a lot of love by inviting people into our home and making them eat food and get drunk basically.
 
Mats Furuli  27:09
I'm the biggest introvert in the history of introverts. So I cannot relate to that part. But yeah, I think I do enjoy being around people. I'm just really bad at taking initiative.
 
Lelia Hilton  27:23
Well, that's okay. At least for me and Christina, our best friends are pretty much all introverts because what's happened is that we've gone into the world and just kind of like forced them into our friendship.
 
Christina Kann  27:35
Shut up, Lelia, please tell the story of Jason and Haley.
 
Lelia Hilton  27:40
Oh, the vax story? Oh my god.
 
Christina Kann  27:45
Please, tell us a story.
 
Lelia Hilton  27:46
So we all know Haley, sweet Haley, can be a little shy, even though that's hard to believe for her on the podcast, but she's very introverted, as is my husband, Jason. He's as introverted as I am extroverted, basically. And they try, they do the do. And they both were going to get their second shots of their vaccines for COVID. And they both happened to have appointments at the same place and same time in Richmond, didn't know. They're standing in line, or should I say in queue?
 
Christina Kann  28:22
They're like five feet apart.
 
Lelia Hilton  28:23
They're five feet apart from each other in queue, in line. And Haley just starts sending me texts while I'm at work, and she's like, "I think that this--" I feel like I should pull it up. Just like "I think this guy that I'm seeing, he's like tall and blond and looks exactly like Jason. But like, also, it could be not Jason, because he has on his mask. And then like, What would I say? What if it wasn't? What would I do then? And then what if it was Jason, what do we do? We can't talk from there." Then she sends me a picture and she's like, "Ma'am, is this your husband?" Like, yes!
 
Christina Kann  29:06
Just ask him! I had like, I have like a long conversation with Haley after that. I was like, "Hey, babe, next time just be like, yo Jason!" and if he doesn't turn around, you're good. And she's like, "What if he does her? What if he's like, I'm not Jason!"
 
Lelia Hilton  29:20
Like, I don't think anyone would do that. But yeah, and then later, before I got home, I called Jason. I was like, "Hi, why didn't you say hi to Haley?" And he was like, "What the fuck? How did you know about that?"
 
Christina Kann  29:34
Okay, so the whole story is just to demonstrate that we to have friends who need their emotional support extrovert.
 
Lelia Hilton  29:42
And we're here for you.
 
Christina Kann  29:43
Oh, there was a meme going around the internet that -- well by "going around the internet" I mean, I saw it one time a long time ago. It was a Slytherin saying "Ma'am, I need that. That's my emotional support Hufflepuff." That's how I feel was Sean.
 
Lelia Hilton  30:01
It made me feel good about myself a little bit. Not really at first -- I mean not always because they do portray the Puffs like in a very big dumb energy
 
Christina Kann  30:12
Big dumb. Like all himbos.
 
Lelia Hilton  30:14
All himbos.
 
Christina Kann  30:16
Yeah but I agree that it was like the first time that I ever felt pride in being a Hufflepuff that wasn't in an abstract, fandom kind of way. I know this was a fan-produced show, but it was almost like giving me cannon to identify with. Which I guess is sometimes the whole point of fan-fiction, to fill in the gaps where the author has failed. And the Hufflepuffs in the Harry Potter series, with a couple exceptions, are not portrayed very well. Really it's like Gryffindor and Ravenclaw, or like go home because obviously, all Slytherins are evil, we'll get to that in a minute with the Snakes. But also the Puffs are like just kind of like jellyfish. They just suck. Justin Finch-Fletchley is just like a whiny bitch boy; just like, come on, buck up. It's a snake. You got it. And then there's Ernie MacMillan, whomst I hate so much.
 
Lelia Hilton  31:16
Ernie Mac in the play.
 
Christina Kann  31:19
Yeah. And then Justin Finch-Fletchley was J-Finch. He was like -- I don't remember what he said. He was like, "I'm boyish, like cute."
 
Lelia Hilton  31:27
He was always like, "I'm J-Finchin' over here." All I remember is that everybody in the play just started treating him like he was invisible.
 
Christina Kann  31:37
Imaginary. Yeah, because Leanne says it once. She's like, "Blah, blah, blah. And like J-Finch, he's a great wizard, even though he's imaginary." And you could see his face just be like, "Am I fuckin imaginary?"
 
Lelia Hilton  31:52
Very un-Puff of everyone to gang up against him.
 
Christina Kann  31:59
Um, so let's talk about the Snakes. The way that this play, like pokes fun at the Harry Potter series is by like, doubling down on things. So they're like, "All Snakes are evil, and that kid looks like he would throw a glass of white wine in your face," right? Which is the funniest description of anyone I've ever heard in my life.
 
Lelia Hilton  32:24
They all have this expression that looks like they're about to throw a glass of white wine on your face. They're all, you know, 12 but they all still share that expression.
 
Christina Kann  32:35
Honestly, 12-year-old Tom Felton did look like he would throw a glass of white wine in your face.
 
Lelia Hilton  32:45
Totally, completely.
 
Christina Kann  32:47
Yeah. So good casting there. Did we even see any Snakes? Were there any Snake characters? I don't even remember.
 
Mats Furuli  32:59
We did get a little bit of Draco.
 
Christina Kann  33:02
Oh, yeah. If you think Harry was joke, Draco was a goddamn joke. He had like a tiara, right? Or like a crown.
 
Mats Furuli  33:13
Oh and a little bit of goyle during the Sorting. Just the name "Goyle."
 
Christina Kann  33:20
I've thought about that before, about how Crabbe and Goyle's names are Vincent and Gregory, which are so much more attractive names. Like a man named Vincent, he could be attractive. You know what I mean? But not Crabbe.
 
Lelia Hilton  33:45
Also the name Vincent Crabbe just reminds me of like, a really cute animated crab named Vincent.
 
Christina Kann  33:53
*singing* Vincent the crab, just pinchin on shit.
 
Lelia Hilton  33:58
J-pinch.
 
Christina Kann  34:04
Oh my god. Darwin went to the Galapagos to study the J-pinches.
 
Lelia Hilton  34:11
And he was disappointed.
 
Christina Kann  34:15
Let's talk about the teachers in this play. I think the teacher we saw the most was like -- Oh, we got to see Snape considerably. Like Snape was a joke, Snape had nothing to do with the plot. Leila is doing a gag right now. You gotta watch the play to figure out what it is. Yeah, there's a bit where Snape gives a sex ed talk. And if you think Alan Rickman's voice in the Harry Potter movies is like low and dramatic, you have no idea.
 
Lelia Hilton  34:49
He really sits on the quality that Alan Rickman has. I like to call it lovingly "the egg," or the old "egg yolk in the back of the throat" sound.
 
Christina Kann  34:59
I call it the whomping. He was womping so hard that I couldn't understand anything he said. I don't think you were supposed to.
 
Lelia Hilton  35:13
No.
 
Christina Kann  35:14
It sounds if you're watching a movie and a grenade goes off near someone, or like a gunshot, and they have temporary hearing loss, and everything's just like, "Womp womp womp." That's what it was like.
 
Lelia Hilton  35:27
Good description.
 
Christina Kann  35:28
I was like, "What is he saying?" So he was a joke, which I appreciated. It's like, we're not even gonna get into this.
 
Lelia Hilton  35:37
And then, he was still in love with "Lillith" in this one. Which reminds me of Frasier. If anyone likes Frasier.
 
Christina Kann  35:45
Oh, I have not watched Frasier.
 
Lelia Hilton  35:47
I highly recommend; it ages really well.
 
Christina Kann  35:50
I think it's good to know at age as well.
 
Lelia Hilton  36:04
Yeah, it does. They certainly don't all.
 
Christina Kann  36:09
Ain't that the truth? But you know what does age well? Puffs.
 
Lelia Hilton  36:14
Nice.
 
Christina Kann  36:14
Thank you, bringing us back. And then there was that one actor who played McGonagall, Sprout, and Dumbledore #1. They switched actors for Dumbledore when the films did, which was so funny. This one actor just did like everything, like all of her different teachers' voices were so impressive, like vocal control, you know?
 
Lelia Hilton  36:40
Yes. And then what's up with -- what is it? Zach? What's the name of the Quidditch --
 
Christina Kann  36:45
Zach Smith?
 
Lelia Hilton  36:46
Zack Smith!
 
Mats Furuli  36:48
The fucking Quidditch tryouts.
 
Christina Kann  36:52
Did y'all watch the outtakes at the end?
 
Lelia Hilton  36:55
Yes, I did.
 
Mats Furuli  36:56
Yeah.
 
Christina Kann  36:57
So the actor was like -- they put a little subtitle on the screen, saying that the actor is allowed to come out and say whatever he wants to start the Quidditch tryouts. So this actor went on like a five-minute-long monologue describing the plot of 27 Dresses as if it had happened to him personally.
 
Mats Furuli  37:18
It's probably my favorite scene in the entire show -- or in the entire play -- because, like, improvised -- fucking, yeah.
 
Christina Kann  37:28
Hilarious, like, really the funniest shit. And at the end, during the credits, they showed some outtakes of all the different ideas. Some people are funny, dude. Improv is hard. You just got to keep talking.
 
Lelia Hilton  37:45
I hope it works out. Hope it's funny.
 
Mats Furuli  37:48
I'm really bad at improv.
 
Christina Kann  37:52
That's why I'm just like, so passingly okay at improv, because I can literally keep talking forever. Anyway, where even was I? Backing up... Zach Smith.. backing up. That was that was the actor who played J-Finch. All of the kids played -- I call them kids because they're Hogwarts students. All of the actors played so many different people. There was a lot of very -- Okay, so I did theater in high school. Mats, did you? Have you ever done theater?
 
Mats Furuli  38:29
No.
 
Christina Kann  38:29
Not your vibe; I get it. And I know Lelia's done theater. Some of those quick changes were so quick. And in the beginning, I was really impressed. I mean, the whole thing is very impressive. But you quickly realize that they're all wearing like 17 layers of clothing that they keep just like rearranging. It's smart. But a couple a couple of those quick changes were like, "Oh, shit!"
 
Mats Furuli  38:51
Yeah.
 
Christina Kann  38:51
There was one scene where Leanne like fell off the stage and I was like, "That was kind of dumb." But one split second later, the the actress comes back on as Fleur Delacour. Like, "Oh, okay, I get it now." Like very impressive. It really took me back to high school, where I was part of the team, the Quick Change team, which is super fun if your leading man is very hot. Eric Fisher, Eric Fischer, if you're out there, love you, bud. He used to run off stage, and all the girls would be there stripping his clothes off as fast as we could, like QUICKLY! And then we'd shove him back into his like, waistcoat and cap or whatever, we'd be like, "Get out there, stud." So that was a lot of fun. And yeah, it took me right back. I just love the theater dude. It involves so much more -- obviously movies are great, but like movies have Hollywood, you know what I mean? And plays are -- you need to design every element of them to be seamless and straightforward. You know what I mean? It's like people and things need to be where they're supposed to be, everything has to work right the first time because it's live, you know. And so you can tell how aggressively they've practiced. And, like, I cannot convey enough how much every single person on the cast walked like all over the stage at all times. So there was like four or five doors -- maybe like six doors, I don't remember, four to six doors -- that they were just coming in and out of constantly. That was their set structure was these doors. There was this one moment where two of the doors across the stage from each other both open, and the two actors make eye contact, or maybe they like, shoot a spell at each other. And I was like, that precision is insane. Dude, precision.
 
Lelia Hilton  40:48
Yeah. I mean, I think it's, I find something extremely charming about these types of productions that are clearly done on the budget of like, a ham sandwich, you know?
 
all  40:57
Yeah.
 
Lelia Hilton  40:58
Because the thing is that it doesn't take anything away from it at all. If anything, it just adds more charm. I mean, when you see Wayne with his t-shirts, where he's literally taken like a piece of construction paper and like, drawn a badger's head and taped it to his shirt.
 
Christina Kann  41:19
Yeah, since we're back on this shirt subject again, the one that made me laugh is that Megan was wearing what was clearly a Nirvana shirt, but they taped over it and it just said "90s Grunge Band." I don't know why it made me laugh. I was like, "That's obviously Nirvana."
 
Lelia Hilton  41:41
Hers were really funny. I mean, all of the costumes, all of this sets, pretty much everything. There was nothing spectacular about any of it. It wasn't about the spectacle. It was about these actors that just worked their asses off and gave an amazing performance. The script was great. Clearly there has to have been more than one director. I mean, how...?
 
Christina Kann  42:05
To something like this together?
 
Lelia Hilton  42:07
Maybe I'm wrong. I don't know. But you're right. I mean, like, who knows how long it took everybody to practice? Cuz you're right. The thing about theater is like, in Hollywood, it's so glossy. And the actors are pretty much all stars.
 
Christina Kann  42:22
And it's not like that doesn't take work. But it's totally different.
 
Lelia Hilton  42:27
Completely different. And it's a lot more high stakes when you can't just yell "cut" and do another take.
 
Christina Kann  42:34
Yes, yeah, you have to learn how to do right the first time.
 
Lelia Hilton  42:38
And every time.
 
Mats Furuli  42:40
The thought of doing theater terrifies me for that reason.
 
Christina Kann  42:44
It's terrifying. It's terrifying. I really am not the kind of person who is prone to nerves, but it's the Puff in me, the notion of fucking up other people is like, the worst thing I could possibly imagine. It's like a lot. If I fuck up in a way that fucks other people up. I'm done.
 
Mats Furuli  43:04
Yeah.
 
Christina Kann  43:07
And that's why improv stresses me out a lot. When I did improv like a year or two ago now, I had such bad anxiety because it's such a team sport. You have to be giving to your scene partner, like so much. And it's like, if you fail them, then it's like, "I'm sorry. You failed because I failed first."
 
Lelia Hilton  43:30
Yeah, it's a it's a team effort, which is terrifying. But also like, what's more Puff? You know?
 
Christina Kann  43:35
Yeah, you're right. And Puffs aren't afraid of failure.
 
Lelia Hilton  43:39
Yeah. Well, everyone's a little afraid of failure, I think.You were talking about like, fucking up on stage. Let's see. I was in plays all throughout high school, but I went to a center for the arts high school where the actors -- where the kids; they were children; it was high school -- where the children were very serious about theater. Like, that's what they wanted to do. So, in order to get the lead in a play, you had to be like, good. You couldn't just be like the only girl who can sing there. Like, no, you had to be like a triple threat.
 
Christina Kann  44:18
My school was like that, too. Lelia is a little butthurt because Jason got a lot of leading roles at his other school.
 
Lelia Hilton  44:25
Danny in Greece. Are you serious right now?
 
Christina Kann  44:28
If you've met Jason -- I love the man and he's great at a lot of things. But I feel like if you've met him, you're like, "I don't see where Jason and Danny overlap." Like, where's the overlap?
 
Lelia Hilton  44:41
Not really what you'd think of as leading man material, but you know, just one man's opinion. I was in A Midsummer Night's Dream, the play, which was super fun. We did it -- I don't even know -- my sophomore year?
 
Christina Kann  44:56
That is such a fun play to put on.
 
Lelia Hilton  44:59
So fun and very funny, and the kids were so talented that they had the audience dying laughing at a Shakespeare play in high school. So it was wonderful. But you know, I was a nobody, so I was Peaseblossom.
 
Christina Kann  45:16
That's the most fun, though, is just be a fucking fairy running around.
 
Lelia Hilton  45:19
I was a little fairy. And there's much of the play which consists of my least favorite thing to do on stage, which is sit there and be quiet.
 
Christina Kann  45:29
Yeah, they do just be observing for so much of that play.
 
Lelia Hilton  45:33
It's hard, yo. I'm fidgety AF. And it's really hard for me to sit somewhere but still focus on what's going on. So as you can imagine, what happened was most nights when we were performing, I would just be sitting there, and I should have just been listening so that I could be ready for my, you know, like, two lines. And instead, what happened was an awful silence encompassed to the stage. And all of a sudden, I snapped back to reality and I was like, "I'm on stage" and I was like, "And I and and, and you to my Lord," or whatever my line was. Yeah, that's a terrifying feeling, to just be sitting there and then there's just silence.
 
Christina Kann  46:15
It's your silence.
 
Lelia Hilton  46:16
It's my silence.
 
Christina Kann  46:20
Okay, well, now that all of our listeners have a ton of anxiety in their stomachs, um, uh, who who is your favorite character in this? We already asked who did you relate the most to, but who is your favorite character?
 
Lelia Hilton  46:32
Uh, so hard. Mats, do you know? It's hard to pick. They're also great.
 
Christina Kann  46:36
Yeah, I do really like Wayne. Which is kind of weird because well, I don't really typically like the characters that I relate to, I don't think but-- Mats, love yourself.
 
Mats Furuli  46:51
It's hard, okay!
 
Lelia Hilton  46:54
Don't talk about our friend that way, Mats.
 
Christina Kann  46:56
Well, it's cool that the Puffs have given us a main character that is relatable. And it's like, wow, he's having a hard time with some really relatable shit. I can't relate to this prophecy bullshit, Harry, get over yourself.
 
Mats Furuli  47:10
Oh, yeah.
 
Lelia Hilton  47:12
What does he say at the beginning? During the sorting hat time, he's like, "What about if like, sir, for example, like, a kid didn't have maybe like a strong enough personality for any of that?"
 
Mats Furuli  47:25
Yeah, didn't have enough of a personality to be sorted into anything.
 
Christina Kann  47:31
Your only personality trait is that you look like you're about to throw a glass of white wine in someone's face.
 
Lelia Hilton  47:38
Yeah, at least it's not that.
 
Mats Furuli  47:41
I'd rather have a bland personality than talk as though I'm about to throw a glass of wine into someone's face.
 
Lelia Hilton  47:50
Yeah, but just to reiterate, I don't feel that you have a bland personality at all.
 
Mats Furuli  47:56
Oh, certainly not. See, that's the thing. That's the thing.The way that Hufflepuffs are depicted in Harry Potter is a caricature. And once you start putting real life people into Hufflepuff house, it has like a beautiful varied personality. All shades of yellow, you know? It's beautiful. 50 shades of yellow. No.
 
Lelia Hilton  48:17
50 shades of yellow. Oh, that sounds --
 
Christina Kann  48:20
I love it. I love it. That's like -- I'm not gonna say it.
 
Lelia Hilton  48:24
It's pee. It's piss. It sounds like piss. It sounds like sex and piss. Just say it, Christina.
 
Christina Kann  48:31
No, my brain went grosser.
 
Lelia Hilton  48:33
Oh.
 
Christina Kann  48:33
I don't have to say it on the podcast. Okay. No, no, I have to say it now. To me, it sounds like a diaper explosion.
 
all  48:40
*screams*
 
Lelia Hilton  48:44
Ew!!!
 
Christina Kann  48:45
Moving on. In this Zoom call, we have two shades of yellow because Mats is wearing a Restricted Section shirt, and I'm an idiot and I never think to dress up for anything, but I happen to be wearing a very deep mustard yellow button-up because I had a lot of meetings. So Mats, is that your final answer? Wayne?
 
Mats Furuli  49:05
Yeah, I think so.
 
Christina Kann  49:06
That's a strong choice. Lelia, what about you?
 
Lelia Hilton  49:08
I really enjoyed the actor who played Harry Potter and also Moaning Myrtle and Susie. And that was that was about it, right?
 
Christina Kann  49:22
You can only do so much.
 
Lelia Hilton  49:24
You say that, but some of them be playing like six fucking characters.
 
Mats Furuli  49:29
The same two people played all the teachers.
 
Christina Kann  49:31
Yeah, it did get confusing when like Leanne would walk offstage and then walk back onstage, and like, we're in love with her now. It's like, "Wait -- oh, she's different. She's a different person now. She's wearing different clothes. She's wearing a different hat. I get it."
 
Lelia Hilton  49:44
Suspension of disbelief is extremely important in a play like this, where every actor plays lots of parts. Except I don't think Wayne played anything else, except he might have been like hooded up as a Snake.
 
Christina Kann  49:58
I definitely saw him in a hood and I was like, that's our boy Wayne right there.
 
Lelia Hilton  50:03
That's my boy! Wayne, you're not a real Snake.
 
Christina Kann  50:07
So Lelia, pulled a Puff. I asked what your favorite character was, and you listed two actors and all six characters that they played, or whatever.
 
Lelia Hilton  50:16
Oh, I have to just pick one? Okay.
 
Christina Kann  50:17
Pick one character.
 
Lelia Hilton  50:19
Um, okay. Um, oh gosh, I hate that I'm doing this, but I really liked Harry.
 
Christina Kann  50:25
I did too.
 
Lelia Hilton  50:26
Yeah?
 
Mats Furuli  50:27
He was great.
 
Christina Kann  50:29
Harry is so much funnier in this than he ever is in Harry Potter.
 
Lelia Hilton  50:34
And so endearing.
 
Christina Kann  50:36
He's very endearing. He has, like I said, drunk toddler energy, just like confused and raring to go, you know?
 
Lelia Hilton  50:45
I feel like they could have gone another way with it and make Harry a little bit more like hottie.
 
Christina Kann  50:53
Himbo.
 
Lelia Hilton  50:53
Or Yeah, we're just make him like a little bit more -- because he is does literally like fuck up their entire lives. They could have kind of focused on that more and went a little more negative with him, but they didn't. They were just like, "I guess this is just our lives now." And then at the same time they still made Harry somebody who can kind of fit into the Puffs world.
 
Christina Kann  51:16
Yeah, it's almost like this Harry is the Hufflepuff perspective of book Harry. It's just a silly friend doing his best, you know, just like stumbling around getting into shenanigans. Like, you know what I mean? Cast a yellow light on the whole situation.
 
Lelia Hilton  51:33
Well, it's such a loving perspective.
 
Christina Kann  51:36
Yeah, loving.
 
Lelia Hilton  51:37
I mean, what's the Snakes' perspective of Harry? Just like this --
 
Christina Kann  51:43
James Potter?
 
Lelia Hilton  51:44
Yeah, this arrogant James Potter idiot douchebag who doesn't deserve anything and is like ruining everything. And it should have been me, me, me. And then versus the Puffs' perspective is just like, "Oh, you know, like, that's our friend Harry. And like, you know, he's always getting into trouble. And he's always kind of like doing kooky things, but it's okay. Like, we're here for him if he needs."
 
Mats Furuli  52:09
I definitely think that Wayne gets kind of annoyed with Harry.
 
Lelia Hilton  52:13
Oh, yeah.
 
Christina Kann  52:13
That's part of his arc.
 
Mats Furuli  52:15
Yep.
 
Christina Kann  52:17
Because in order to become a true Puff, you need your Puffness tested, and you need to overcome it and become a stronger Puff on the other side.
 
Mats Furuli  52:25
100%.
 
Christina Kann  52:26
So I also was going to list Harry as my favorite character. I feel like that's a role where the actor brought everything to that role. You know what I mean? I think that someone with a personality that was a little different would -- like if Leanne, the actor who played Leanne -- had played Harry -- could have done it. Would have looked weird. She's like a tall-ass redhead. But it would have been like a different energy. So I feel like you can really feel the energy of that Harry actor coming through. I'll go ahead and say that my favorite character was -- this is what happens when we get to plugs every week on this fucking podcast. I'm like, uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. My favorite character -- um, I -- fuck, it's just Harry. No, no. Okay, wait. I really liked Cedric too. I don't feel like the films conveyed him as big Hufflepuff energy. He just has a "white British boy" personality like every other fucking person in that movie. Nothing about him says Hufflepuff except that he's like, "Hey, guys, maybe don't bully this younger student." You know what I mean? It's like, not quite enough. But this Cedric in Puffs was a leader and he was a sweetie and he was a tender boy and I loved him.
 
Lelia Hilton  53:46
Yeah, he was a wonderful leader.
 
Christina Kann  53:48
Yeah, he really was. He got people excited to lose. You know what I mean? Yeah, I admire him.
 
Mats Furuli  53:57
He's definitely one of my favorites as well.
 
Christina Kann  53:59
Yeah. I love every character that was  different from from the original text. McGonagall was the same, a lot of the teachers were like exactly the same. Sprout at one point basically comes off the backstage high, basically, like, "What do you need? Alright, well, is everything okay? All right. Bye." Or like, whatever she said. I don't even remember that exchange.
 
Lelia Hilton  54:23
That's another character that that mom character plays right? She's like, "50 points from Gryffindor for upsetting my plants." From Puff -- from Hufflepuff -- from Puff. Ugh!
 
Christina Kann  54:41
A little Hufflepuff-n-stuff. Um, okay, so I'm gonna ask one closing question, and then we'll wrap it up. So my final question is, what was your favorite joke in Puffs that was a nod to the original text, or the movie. I keep saying "text" but like, you know what I'm saying. Which was your favorite joke that was clearly making fun of Harry Potter?
 
Lelia Hilton  55:03
There's so many.
 
Mats Furuli  55:04
Yeah, there are a lot. I loved every time where there's an event from the books where a character does something, and then we see in Puffs that the action from that character was sparked by Wayne doing something. Like Wayne crashing into Ginny and convincing Ginyto throw the diary into the toilet.
 
Christina Kann  55:34
Yes!
 
Mats Furuli  55:34
And also when he convinces Cedric to ask Cho out to the Yule Ball.
 
Lelia Hilton  55:45
Oh yeah.
 
Mats Furuli  55:46
What's the what's the last one I'm thinking? in year five, when Dumbledore comes in, and he's like, "Hey, so have you seen Harry? I'm thinking about maybe explaining some things about his past and why I've been avoiding him." And Wayne's just like, "Yeah, I haven't seen him." "Okay, I guess we'll just wait until the end of the year."
 
Christina Kann  56:10
Wayne is just like shit-faced and is like, "No, I haven't fucking seen him." Um, I really liked the bit where -- this is such a classic comedy bit. Just the juxtaposition when Voldemort is doing his scary loud voice thing over all of Hogwarts and he's like, "Bring Harry to me." And then he keeps talking and he doesn't realize he's still on loudspeaker.
 
Mats Furuli  56:45
He's like "Did anyone bring any board games? Or snacks?"
 
Christina Kann  56:51
That actor's performance of Voldemort reminded me so much of Him from Powerpuff Girls. Do y'all know who I'm talking about?
 
Lelia Hilton  57:00
No, but Haley said something about that, too.
 
Christina Kann  57:03
Ooh! Haley, this one's for you, babe. Okay, well, I'll put a clip in the show notes. Go check out Him. I it's the voice. It's the voice, it's very like, *lofty voice* "Oh, wow, well well well." I feel like that also sounded like I was trying to do a McGonagall impression.
 
Lelia Hilton  57:23
It's kind of like when any of us try to do any accent as well. *terribly British accent* "Oh, oh, wicked good, biscuits, tea and biscuits.
 
Christina Kann  57:36
Oh my god. Lelia, what was your favorite crossover moment?
 
Lelia Hilton  57:41
I can't get this out of my head. I already talked about; I wish I didn't. But the stupid screaming cup. Goddammit. I mean, I'd like I think I might have peed from laughing so hard. It's that funny. It's just like a clever joke, a really simple joke, it's so simple that like, I wish I had thought of it.
 
Christina Kann  58:03
Yes! And there's a lot of jokes like that in this play, where it's just a split second. And if you miss it, it's fine. But like, you're gonna miss them if you're not paying attention. This was a no-devices viewing. Just me and the TV, eye contact for two straight hours.
 
Lelia Hilton  58:21
I agree. I thought about taking notes and then I was like, "Yeah, no, I need to be here. I gotta be here and present."
 
Christina Kann  58:27
Yeah, well, here I didn't even -- let me pull up my fucking notes, because I did write them, and I pulled them up for this. Here's my notes. Okay. "Year one :Harry Potter is super cute. Emo Puff Megan. Herbology is awesome. Is Ron a broom?" I don't know why I like -- obviously Ron was a mop. I don't know why my brain was like "broom broom broom." Okay, my next note is "Puff formation number four. We are not a threat. Please be our friend." Which, I love that so much. I feel like that's me walking into the bathroom at like a concert. You know, and I'm like, "I'm not a threat. Please be my friend."
 
Lelia Hilton  59:04
Yes. Haley actually said perhaps that should be what we chant when we have new guests on the pod.
 
Christina Kann  59:15
Okay, here's the fun note. This play took time for weird asides, which I feel like is very Puffy. Huffy Puffy. You know what I mean? Like they got off on tangents just to make us giggle. And that feels like a bunch of stoned Hufflepuffs in a room trying to tell a story, you know?
 
Lelia Hilton  59:31
Hundo p.
 
Christina Kann  59:32
Yeah. I'm almost done with my notes, don't worry.
 
Mats Furuli  59:36
I have so many notes.
 
Christina Kann  59:39
Well Mats, you'd seen this before. I should have watched it a couple times and then tried to eventually take notes, but the plot doesn't matter really, because you already are familiar with the plot. It's just the Hufflepuff version. So my next note is Cedric's quote about failing. "Failure is just another form of practice as long as you never stop trying." And I fucking love that big Puff energy.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:00:02
I think I think I did like get a little emotional when he said that.
 
Christina Kann  1:00:06
Yes.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:00:07
I love that.
 
Christina Kann  1:00:09
Absolutely. Okay, so I guess the end of my notes is, is when I was like, "Okay, I'm only gonna write down the really good stuff." Okay, I like how in Puffs of the bar is set so low, that progress is so achievable, which I feel like is really relatable. If we're just aiming for third place, you know what I mean? First place, that's kind of a lot, and we're setting ourselves up for disappointment. But like, third place? Now that -- that we could do. The tempering of expectations. And then my final note from this viewing is, "We all find that part of us: the Puff," and I don't even remember the context, but I wrote it down. And so I guess it moved me. We all find that part of us. The Puff.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:00:57
Yeah. And I think we do. I think everyone has a little bit of Puff in them. And if not, you're a psychopath.
 
Mats Furuli  1:01:03
So true.
 
Christina Kann  1:01:03
I was going to say sociopath. Yeah, absolutely. And I think that a lot of people, at least in my life, are becoming like more Puff as we grow older. Learning how to communicate, learning that your personal relationships are a priority, and you have to nurture them, like a plant so that they grow in the sun.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:01:27
So Sprouty of you.
 
Christina Kann  1:01:30
So is there anything that we haven't covered yet? Anything either one of you would like to touch on before we wrap this up?
 
Mats Furuli  1:01:35
I mean, I have over three pages of notes. So if I were to --
 
Christina Kann  1:01:39
Okay, lay it on me.
 
Mats Furuli  1:01:41
One of the very opening lines is just very fitting. "If you find yourself in need of using the loo make sure you make a big show of it." All about drama!
 
Lelia Hilton  1:01:53
Yes!
 
Mats Furuli  1:01:56
Also, yeah, freak chocolate frog accident? All caps and three question marks.
 
Christina Kann  1:02:02
Oh, yeah. Who was that? Wayne's his parents died in a freak chocolate frog accident. Oh, that's the Puffest shit. Wait, I didn't even mention that Wayne was raised by his uncle in New Mexico or Arizona. What was it?
 
Mats Furuli  1:02:18
The land of Cattle Poke Springs, New Mexico.
 
Christina Kann  1:02:23
New Mexico. And Wayne gets his letter, and he's like, "Uncle Dave, like, what is this?" and his uncle's like "Oh fuck. I definitely meant to tell you about that."
 
Mats Furuli  1:02:33
"Uncle Dave, there's a bird in the living room." And Uncle Dave's like "What kind of bird?" "Uh, an owl, I think." "Oh, fuck."
 
Christina Kann  1:02:48
I love Uncle Dave. He did his best.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:02:50
Yeah.
 
Mats Furuli  1:02:51
And the next one is Blundering Wimpersnatch. Is that a Benedict Cumberbatch joke?
 
Christina Kann  1:02:57
Oh, oh my god. That's funny. Definitely.
 
Mats Furuli  1:03:01
I love the fact that Mirror of Erisedis just called Rorrim Driew, which is just "weird mirror" spelled backwards.
 
Christina Kann  1:03:10
Okay, these are some details I've never noticed.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:03:12
Yeah.
 
Christina Kann  1:03:14
We'll have to look for these next time, Lelia.
 
Mats Furuli  1:03:15
Some of the spell names are phenomenal, like Rickman-Sempra instead of "rictusempra." "Expelli-dermis," when Mr. Voldy just rips off the fucking band aid or whatever he's got over his nose. And "Olive Gardium leviosa."
 
Christina Kann  1:03:37
Yes, that one's stuck in my memory forever.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:03:40
What's the one where he kept generating doves?
 
Mats Furuli  1:03:43
Oh, uh, fuck. It's like "Aviforus" or something like that? Yeah,
 
Christina Kann  1:03:49
There was a couple magical moments in this that I could not explain scientifically. My eyes didn't move fast enough to figure out how this bird was getting around the stage. And there's one or two other things where I was like, "Damn, how did they do that?"
 
Mats Furuli  1:04:03
Oh my god. Same. Yeah, and the dueling club scene where Harry's like "No snake, please don't attack Justin," but unfortunately that's not what the rest of the school heard. It's like a fucking demon.
 
Christina Kann  1:04:23
He was like evidently speaking in tongues It is evil.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:04:31
He's like "No, snake! Don't hurt Justin!"
 
Mats Furuli  1:04:36
Also "real Mr. Moody costume." Yeah, it's Mad-Eye Moody. But he just tries to convince everyone that he's the real Mr. Moody. So I think his credited character name is "real Mr. Moody."
 
Lelia Hilton  1:04:54
Okay, real Professor Moody.
 
Christina Kann  1:04:57
I like that he literally just had a giant googly eye.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:05:05
But it worked like it. They pulled it off!
 
Christina Kann  1:05:08
It definitely worked. Yeah. And it made me laugh, a lot.
 
Mats Furuli  1:05:11
Same. Yeah. The next note is I really want a copy of Wayne's book on Fantastic Beasts. The fucking Balrog!
 
Christina Kann  1:05:22
The Balrog!
 
Mats Furuli  1:05:24
Mr. Snuffalufagus!
 
Christina Kann  1:05:30
Oh, yeah. Because Wayne in his introduction, what is it? He's like, "Hi, I'm Wayne. I've read The Silmarillion a hundred times!"
 
Mats Furuli  1:05:35
"I've read The Silmarillion twice!"
 
Christina Kann  1:05:38
Twice? Well that is as impressive as 100 times. The Silmarillion is no joke.
 
Mats Furuli  1:05:43
I have not read The Silmarillion yet.
 
Christina Kann  1:05:44
Yeah. Me neither. Because it's no joke.
 
Mats Furuli  1:05:48
And when Cedric turns the book around, it's Paddington, and a Dalek from Dr. Who.
 
Christina Kann  1:05:54
Yes. Paddington!
 
Lelia Hilton  1:06:01
So random.
 
Christina Kann  1:06:02
Also, yeah. Wonder what kinds of dragons are in the book. Blue Eyes White Dragon, probably from Yu-Gi-Oh. Yeah, Wayne's like a straight up like nerd, dude. I fucking love it.
 
Mats Furuli  1:06:16
So good. And also I love that the play brought this up. Why the fuck did Cedric think that transfiguring a rock into a dog was a good idea when fighting the dragon. It's like, there's no fucking way this is going to end well. And the dragon just fucking bites the head off the dog.
 
Christina Kann  1:06:39
I forget who was like "There is now a dead dog on the field. There is a dead dog."
 
Mats Furuli  1:06:44
The Ludo Bagman character, played by the guy who plays Zack Smith.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:06:51
And J-Finch!
 
Mats Furuli  1:06:51
Yeah, the fact that the play's told from the point of view of Cedric's friends made Cedric's death absolutely heartbreaking.
 
Christina Kann  1:07:06
Yeah. I thought about bringing that up. And then I was like, too dark. Because right before the the intermission, too. You know how in the movie, the music is still playing, but like, you know, something is super wrong? It's like trauma, trauma, trauma. The feeling of that music, you can see it in their faces when he  comes back. And then it just like fades off. And I'm sure when you're watching the show live, the lights just fade out, and it's like, intermission, have fun bitches. Absolutely. mortifying? Well, because they have no idea that anything is wrong. You know what I mean? Like, they don't have any of the context of the whole rest of the goddamn book.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:07:51
And I mean, they really just introduced Cedric to us in the fourth book, so we never really got time to know him in the books. Yeah, it was extremely sad for Harry when he died because they became friends. But we as the audience really got to know him, like from day one. So it's just like, I'm like, "No, he's gone." But it's okay. Because he comes back as Voldemort.
 
Mats Furuli  1:08:20
Also, I'd do anything for a Puff hug right now.
 
Christina Kann  1:08:25
Oh, yeah! Two of them would hug, and then the other would say "Coming in!" So cute.
 
Mats Furuli  1:08:35
Adorable. And yeah, which kind of Voldemort is the worst? The one that never shows affection or the overly affectionate one?
 
Christina Kann  1:08:43
Oh, yeah! Wait, that's a great -- Okay, wait, I'm changing my favorite joke from the movie to this. Because everyone makes fun of the infamous Voldemort-Draco hug, but in this he's lik -- to some random Death Eater -- he's like, "Let me show that I'm grateful with my physical affection" and starts giving him a hug and a neckrub.
 
Mats Furuli  1:09:05
*laughing so hard he's kindda choking* It goes on for so long.
 
Christina Kann  1:09:10
It's like kind of bit where it's like it's funny, and then it's not funny, and then it starts being funny.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:09:14
Cuz it goes on that long.
 
Christina Kann  1:09:17
It really was very intense physical affection.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:09:21
He kisses his hand at one point. Yeah, he like down and kneels and kisses his hand!
 
Mats Furuli  1:09:26
I thought about bringing that up when we were talking about Harry kissingWayne's shoulder.
 
Christina Kann  1:09:32
Oh, yeah.
 
Mats Furuli  1:09:36
AOL Instant Messenger.
 
Christina Kann  1:09:38
Oh, yeah!
 
Lelia Hilton  1:09:39
That was cute.
 
Christina Kann  1:09:41
Yeah. One summer Wayne gets sick of owls and is like, "We're doing AIM now."
 
Mats Furuli  1:09:45
Yeah, it's it's because of the ministry intercepting mail.
 
Christina Kann  1:09:53
Oh, yeah. Very smart.
 
Mats Furuli  1:09:55
Yeah.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:09:56
They don't know about that internet.
 
Mats Furuli  1:09:59
I do wonder how I'm making content though.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:10:02
Yeah.
 
Christina Kann  1:10:03
Public library.
 
Mats Furuli  1:10:06
Next note is "Yippee kay-aye, mother-puffer."
 
Christina Kann  1:10:11
Loved it. Yes.
 
Mats Furuli  1:10:13
Yeah. I love the fact that the Death Eaters are called Death Buddies.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:10:21
I think I missed that!
 
Mats Furuli  1:10:24
 Also, yeah. Mr. Voldy and the Death Buddies would make a great band name.
 
Christina Kann  1:10:28
Yes. Well, I think that the Death Buddies, once again, sounds like a Hufflepuff who didn't hear it right. And it's just like, I don't know, it's just him and his Death Buddies. I don't know.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:10:41
They're all friends, I guess. Like, why else would they all be together?
 
Mats Furuli  1:10:47
It's definitely not a racist cult or anything.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:10:49
For sure.
 
Mats Furuli  1:10:53
Yeah, and the last note is, I can't believe that this play actually made me care about characters like Ernie McMillan and Justin Finch-Fletchley.
 
Christina Kann  1:11:01
Yeah. Yeah. Puffs are, like, endearing. You know, like the puffs are, it's like, you just so want them to be happy and safe more than the stupid Gryffindors! Because it's like, when you walk directly into the fire, it's like yeah, you're gonna fucking get burned, you fucking idiot. Like, Harry, why are you doing this? But with the Puffs, this is just their home and they're just trying to be happy. I really did weep at the end when they all come together because it has such a different energy than the Gryffindors. You know what I mean? Like Harry, Ron, and Hermione are not even with the Gryffindors during the final battle because they're too busy each being dramatic spotlight heroes, you know what I mean? It's like we're not even together. Puffs! Puffs. I freakin love em.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:11:58
Yeah. In that last scene, when the Death Eaters are just Avada Kadavra-ing everyone left and right -- it's a very reverent -- it's a very big shift in tone. Well, it really kind of happens for sure when Cedric dies. And then from there, I mean, we still get tons of hilarious bits and jokes and silly bits. But then the tone has shifted to a much more like reverent space. And it's almost like -- I'm so sorry to keep quoting Hamilton --
 
Mats Furuli  1:12:32
Never apologize for quoting Hamilton.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:12:36
Thank you. And Hamilton's not nearly as silly as this. I wish it were. But it's like at the end of Hamilton, when like, it's a very sad ending. But at the same time, it's really sweet and heartwarming. And it just goes to show like, you never know, like, everyone's just living life. This isn't really one person's story and everyone's just living in it. Everyone has their own journey and their own perspective on this whole arc that we're all in.
 
Christina Kann  1:13:11
Yeah, absolutely. It's a team effort. Yes. It's like a family. They say, you know, McGonagall or whatever, says, "Your house will be like your family while you're at Hogwarts." And I feel like, for the Puffs, it's way more true. You know what I mean?
 
Lelia Hilton  1:13:28
Yeah, they took those words extremely seriously.
 
Mats Furuli  1:13:31
And the Gryffindors did not.
 
Christina Kann  1:13:34
Yeah. The Gryffindors exist in each other's space, but they don't act like a family, not even the family members.
 
Mats Furuli  1:13:40
I guess Fred and George, kind of. I feel like by like being the loudest, they kind of brought everyone together to just laugh at them.
 
Christina Kann  1:13:52
That's my technique also! Oh my god. There was one Fred and George quote that I tweeted a couple weeks ago that was so relatable. It was like "Fred and George were dealing with the the added stress by being louder and more boisterous than ever," and I was like, they understand me.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:14:09
There you are there! There she is.
 
Christina Kann  1:14:11
I think if Fred and George had not been Weasleys they would be in Hufflepuff.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:14:16
I was just thinking the same thing. I guess they play Quidditch and help fight and stuff, but--
 
Christina Kann  1:14:24
Hufflepuffs play Quidditch too.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:14:26
Yeah! And they've helped fight too.
 
Christina Kann  1:14:28
Yeah, yeah.
 
Mats Furuli  1:14:31
And, speaking of Quidditch. Hufflepuff out of four games Gryffindor played Hufflepuff, Hufflepuff won three. So ha!
 
Lelia Hilton  1:14:42
Mats' got numbers! We got stats!
 
Christina Kann  1:14:46
Puffs Puffs Puffs! We started this episode by talking about how much we all hate sportsball.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:14:52
It's true. And here we are. Full Circle. A bunch of hypocrites.
 
Christina Kann  1:14:57
You know what? Hufflepuff is good at Quidditch because they're team players.
 
Mats Furuli  1:15:01
Hell yeah.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:15:03
I gotta say, yeah, as somebody who has input into who gets hired in my company that I work for, I would much more go for somebody who is a team player and maybe not a rock star employee. So like, yeah, a Hufflepuff. A Gryffindor is great. They're a rock star, and they're like going to the top, but maybe they're not really paying attention to how their coworkers are drowning.
 
Christina Kann  1:15:25
Interpersonal shit. Absolutely.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:15:27
Yeah. So be more of a Hufflepuff everyone.
 
Mats Furuli  1:15:30
I agree.
 
Christina Kann  1:15:31
I mean, I gotta agree. Yeah, like be more Huff. Be more Puff. I've always said "Huff" but I'm trying to train myself to say "Puff" because it has meaning to me now. Also Puff Puff Pass.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:15:44
Exactly. It's all connected. They didn't do any overt weed jokes. I was a little sad about that.
 
Christina Kann  1:15:52
I was pretty impressed. I don't think I would have been able to avoid the weed jokes.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:15:57
That would have been my first joke I like write down. Like, "I don't know. Puff, puff, pass? Put that in there, I guess."
 
Christina Kann  1:16:07
Are y'all ready to wrap up?
 
Lelia Hilton  1:16:08
Yeah, I think so.
 
Mats Furuli  1:16:09
Yep!
 
Christina Kann  1:16:10
Okay. All right. Lelia, do you want to tell people where they can find you online?
 
Lelia Hilton  1:16:14
Sure thing. If you want to find me online, I'm on Instagram and Twitter as @leelz4realz.
 
Christina Kann  1:16:29
That's linked in the show notes.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:16:30
Linked in the show notes. And you can find me most Sundays talking about movies with my friends in the Movie Night Crew.
 
Christina Kann  1:16:37
Hell yeah. And what's something you've been watching, reading, playing, observing, philosophizing recently that you think our listeners would enjoy?
 
Lelia Hilton  1:16:47
Sure. So this is a little off brand for our listenership. So I don't know who would be interested. But I really enjoy this comedy podcast called This Is Important. Tina, I was talking to you a little bit about it. It's created by the four guys who did Workaholics, so Blake Anderson, Adam Devine, and Kyle Newacheck and Anders Holm. And it's literally those four guys just shooting the shit. They did improv comedy with very esteemed improv groups for a long time and they've been working together and just have been friends forever. So it's just like a really funny, wholesome podcast where dudes just kind of joke on each other. And it has me like laughing so hard, I'm crying. It comes out every single Tuesday and they put one out every week for free on Spotify. So I highly recommend if you are at all a fan of workaholics, or if you're like "I'm not really into that type of humor," you might be surprised. Maybe give it a try.
 
Christina Kann  1:17:53
Yeah, give it a try. Puff energy. Mats, what about you? Do you want people to connect with you on the internet?
 
Mats Furuli  1:17:59
I mean, sure. Yeah. You can find me on Twitter and Instagram @mdotfur.
 
Christina Kann  1:18:10
I do love it. That's how you sign your emails too. And what's something that you would like to recommend to our listeners?
 
Mats Furuli  1:18:18
Well, I've not really been watching anything recently other than Puffs and Hamilton, but--
 
Christina Kann  1:18:25
You could do an old favorite too.
 
Mats Furuli  1:18:27
Sure. Yeah, I'm gonna plug Hamilton.
 
all  1:18:30
Yeah!!!
 
Mats Furuli  1:18:31
It is wonderful. I watched it this morning for the 34th time.
 
Christina Kann  1:18:38
Oh, my God. I'm impressed that you're still keeping track at this point.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:18:41
Yeah. Wow.
 
Mats Furuli  1:18:42
I think yesterday was my 10th. time watching Puffs. Yeah, I'm getting pretty high up in terms of numbers for that one as well.
 
Christina Kann  1:18:55
I need to catch up.
 
Mats Furuli  1:18:59
I feel like everyone at this point knows about Hamilton, and there's not really a whole lot to say about it. It's a phenomenal musical. Written and starring Lin Manuel Miranda, who wrote music for, for example, Moana, which is one of my absolute favorite movies. Probably my favorite Disney movie.
 
Christina Kann  1:19:27
We were fighting about this in the Discord recently.
 
Mats Furuli  1:19:29
Yeah. I love Frozen, I love Tangled, but Moana--
 
Christina Kann  1:19:35
That's the trifecta.
 
Mats Furuli  1:19:36
Yeah.
 
Christina Kann  1:19:37
If you want to be part of our Discord conversations, you can join The Restricted Section Patreon! For as little as $1 a month you can hang out with the gang.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:19:46
We're really nice and fun.
 
Christina Kann  1:19:48
Yeah! Puffs! Yeah, I fully second the Hamilton plug. For sure. It's so good. The last time I watched it was with you, Lelia, and we were just weeping and looking at Grace to make sure she was enjoying it as much as we wanted her to.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:20:07
She was.
 
Christina Kann  1:20:08
Yeah, update: she was.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:20:10
Update: she was.
 
Christina Kann  1:20:10
So I've been your host Christina you can follow me on Instagram @christinathekann. You can follow me on Twitter @christina_kann. Tou can follow me on TikTok @sproutsprivatestash. And this week I would like to recommend-- Because you just mentioned Lin Manuel Miranda, I'm gonna recommend the His Dark Materials series, which I think is an Amazon Prime original. And Lin Manuel Miranda is in it. He plays a character that's called the Texan, which I find to be very endearing. So he's a little bit of like a gun slinging aeronaut with a basically like a pet rabbit. It's like very endearing, just him in a hot air balloon with his bunny being like, *southern accent* "What the heck is going on?" The whole plot of His Dark Materials is much more complex than that. It involves the space-time continuum and the meaning of death. So it's pretty heavy. And then the book series is great too. I recommend them. Lelia! Mats! Thank you guys so much for coming and Puffing it up with me.
 
Mats Furuli  1:21:17
Thank you so much for having me.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:21:19
Any time!
 
Christina Kann  1:21:19
Mats, I could not have dreamed of doing this without you. So thanks for being our guide to the world of Puffs. I think that me and Lelia are both feeling really seen right now.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:21:29
We are! And not only that -- I don't know about you, Tina, but I had never even heard about this before. And I had no idea that there was a platform where it was recorded where we could just watch it. So thank you so much, Mats.
 
Christina Kann  1:21:41
Oh yeah, I guess I should have said at the top of the episode -- I'll say it now in case anyone made it this fucking far and still is like "Maybe I should go watch it." It's available. I think it was available through Amazon to rent for like $3 or whatever.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:21:55
It's worth it.
 
Mats Furuli  1:21:56
It's also on Broadway HD if you have an account there. If not, it's also fairly cheap and also a hundred percent worth it.
 
Lelia Hilton  1:22:09
And if you only want to see Puffs, they have a free trial period that you can just start and just watch Puffs and stop. But you shouldn't, because Broadway is awesome.
 
Christina Kann  1:22:19
Yeah, true. True. Um, yeah, I'm just so glad that we got to go on this journey together. I feel stronger because we're together and I'm just happy to be here with you. Oh, love you guys!
 
all  1:22:38
Puffs! Puffs! Puffs!
 
Lelia Hilton  1:22:38
We are not a threat!